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Celibacy Feature

www.newlyfoundfaith.wordpress.com

Tell me about yourself 

 I am a novelist, public servant and speaker. Oftentimes, I am summoned to speak with youth and young adults, as it pertains to healing, celibacy and education. My recent publication, What Are You Bringing to the Table, has garnered the attention of individuals nationwide as I endeavored to encourage women to take OFF their safari jackets. The focus needs to be on Becoming “The One,” as opposed to Finding“The One.” After all, relationships start in the Mirror, not in the Sheets…

 

What brought you to the celibacy lifestyle? 

Through the grace of God, I have been able to maintain my virginity for 32 years.

 

How has being celibate changed your life?

It has enabled me to think more clearly due to the fact that once you get involved with someone sexually it can certainly cloud your judgment. I am more inclined to discern the hearts of those with false intentions and motivate women to join me in the process to work on as many of our unresolved issues as possible.

 

Do you believe celibacy is something that all women should practice?

Absolutely! Every single woman should practice celibacy. There are entirely too many diseases to engage in casual sex. Your body should be a gift to your husband, not a convenience for your friend.  Engaging in premarital sex during monogamous relationships is still considered fornication. If at all possible, children deserve the opportunity to grow up in solid, two parent household structures (ordained by God of course.

 

What advice would you give to women struggling with deciding to become celibate?

Get to the root of the issue! Are you engaging in pre-marital sex because you fear losing the guy to someone else? Is your body all you have to offer? Are you continuing to have sex because you have already lost your virginity so you think your body is no longer valuable? Waiting until marriage to have sex does NOT guarantee happily ever after, but neither does premarital sex. We live in a sex-crazed society; therefore, you have to be mindful of the company you keep. Don’t half-step the process. For example, if you’re giving up cake, you don’t eat the icing. In simpler terms, no adult toys, oral sex or games to see how close you can get before you cross the line. You wouldn’t get half as many heartbreaks if you worked on your issues and make your body off limits until marriage.

 

What do you say to the women in a relationship who’s been sexually active with her boyfriend and believes she can’t stop having sex with him now because she’s already started?

If –and I mean if- God has ordained for you and your boyfriend to be together, what’s hindering you both from getting married? If you both have committed to cell phone contracts, mortgages, rent, leases, etc, then what’s prohibiting the ultimate commitment? Just because you’ve already started something, does Not mean you can’t stop. If you’re like me, you can attest to the fact that you’ve already started eating more than you should over the years and that is no excuse to continue an unhealthy lifestyle.

 

What words of wisdom do you want to share with our sisters in Christ regarding Celibacy?

Once you really see yourself as a prize, you won’t let just anyone unwrap you. Don’t allow another person to see you in your honeymoon aura, if you have never made it to the honeymoon.

 

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