Archives for posts with tag: Daily Inspiration

This is going to be A LOT of writing  just a forewarning. I’ve found that lately there is an influx of people like myself who struggle with anxiety and depression. I’m willing to share my story to not only feel better but help someone else.

I noticed I was having a struggle with anxiety around the time both of my parents got really ill so maybe 2-3 years ago. Lately it has gotten progressively worst and it’s really a struggle. To get out the bed some days is dreadful. Some days I just want to be in my room, curtains closed and just cry, cry cry. At first I didn’t recognize it was anything but thought I was overly sensitive suddenly. I knew I had these thoughts of I wasn’t good enough, felt like a failure when I couldn’t pass my math class but still I didn’t know this was linked to depression. I felt myself dreading the future, feeling like a fish out of water but STILL I didn’t know this was anxiety. Partially was I thought I had it all together, the other part was I don’t have a chance to be weak because I have so many people depending on me & demanding something of me. That’s another thing I’ve noticed, I have a really hard time saying no and sticking to it. It wasn’t until I spoke to my therapist about my feelings that I found out what was really going on in me.

I wish I could say that it’s something easy to overcome or that you will be over it quickly but I’d be lying. Anxiety and Depression is VERY real, very hard to conquer and takes time to get a handle on. I’m still figuring out daily how to live with it and I’ll say it again, it is very hard! My struggle with it is there is guilt and shame attached to it so it makes me retreat a lot. That’s part of depression, closing yourself off from the world. Isolating yourself from friends, family and social activities is a sign of depression. Those suicidal thoughts, that overwhelming sensitivity, those thoughts of not being good enough, being extra hard on yourself all depression! I’ve had those thoughts of swallowing a handful of pills and ending it all. I’ve had those thoughts of being on the freeway and hitting a high rate of speed and slamming into a wall to end it all. I’ve been there and it isn’t any fun, it’s quite scary actually. What I’m learning is to talk about it and seek help professionally. I’ve learned a couple steps and hopefully you all can share what you do or your experiences with me in the comments.

STEP 1: Understand that this is real, you are NOT alone and that you are valuable. No matter how bad you feel in the moment understand that you ARE valuable, you ARE loved and this isn’t going to take you under.

STEP 2: Make the decision to be around family and friends one day a week. I know you feel like isolating yourself and even hurting yourself is a good decision but it isn’t. Depression & anxiety thrive in isolation so you need to be around people who love you and care for you.

STEP 3: Seek professional help! When you are thinking about ending your life or harming yourself it is time to talk to someone. Pull your closest friend aside and tell them what you are going through as well. You need a network of support, again anxiety and depression thrive in isolation.

These are just a couple of the things I’m doing but I know it’s way more to it than this. I’m no expert, I just know what I’m going through and what is pushing me forward. There’s nothing to be ashamed of here. Many people are silently suffering and I’m making the decision not to suffer in silence anymore. Feel free to comment and let me know how you are coping with this.

 

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Now I know to hear that the suffering we go through is a blessing can sound like an insult, right? I know first hand that I cried my heart, eyes and soul out due to the hardships of life. Isn’t it strange how we can go through something that we feel we can’t bare and we serve this awesome God, but where is he???? Like, what God would treat his children like this? What Loving father would allow you to lose your job, your spouse, your home, your mother or father, right? A good God and if you continue reading I’m going to help you see why he is worthy to be praised in the midst of these and many more troubles. James 1, verse two tells us that when we see trouble this is time to be happy. Sounds impossible up against what you’re facing right now huh? It is not because God has brought you to it to change you in the trouble. A lot of our troubles are troubles because we’ve seen in our past and maybe we didn’t handle it so here it comes again. In my particular case, my faith was a thing I just could not get right to save my entire life and I’d prayed to be more trusting of God so he gave me the opportunity.

A few months ago my family and I started having problems with our landlord. Oh he’s been taking us through the ringer theses days. I’m talking rent increase, 90 day notices, attorneys threatening me and I just freaked out. I cried, I stressed, I doubted, but in the end God came through. He sent a news anchor to tell our story on the most popular new station and in turn our landlord retracted. I was so ecstatic and thanked God for showing up and out in our situation. Now fast forward to February 12, 2015 and here comes this SAME attorney in my emails with a whole new notice. I opened it and low and behold our landlord has decided to sale the place. Ohhhh did I get upset and immediately begin to freak out once AGAIN, crying and screaming BUT I heard “o ye of little faith”.

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I’d reached out to multiple attorneys offices and even called my friend at the news station and they were of little help. Then I remembered, HEY, you have been through this and the same God that saved you from this situation last time will have glory in this situation too. I checked myself and thanked God for bringing me back to this situation to strengthen my faith. See, God equips us with exactly what we need, we just have to be faithful and humble enough to endure and grow from our troubles. I know the growing period and learning phase can feel like it is goingto end your life. I submit to you today to ask GOD, “What lesson are you teaching me in this?” “Where can I grow and how can I do better this next time around?” I promise when you see your trials and tribulations in this light you will feel so much better because it brings you back to the rock. God is standing right there waiting for you to exercise your faith and even pray to him, he is waiting on you to call upon him. He operates in the impossible, in your faith he is at work and all you have to do is believe he is here for you.

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Right now, just lay across your bed, couch or even drop to your knees and say God forgive me for missing the lesson. Lord I know you are faithful, I know you will bring me through so I hand it over to you right here today. I will not stress, doubt or worry about what man can do because you surpass it all. Lord I hear your teaching, I submit to your direction and I praise you for this time of suffering because in it I am made stronger and wiser. Father I outstretch my arms as I lay, stand or kneel acknowledging you for all that you are and welcoming in your spirit to guide me. Forgive me father for(name your sin/doubt) and create in me a new mind and understanding. This is my prayer, my request unto you Oh God. Amen

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If you are in need of prayer, reach out in the comments and I’ll email you. We can walk this path together, connected through God’s love. You have help, you have a prayer partner if you need one and God will see you through. God bless you!

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This bible verse just completely wrecked me when I read it. Lately, I’ve been seeking God and honestly it has not been with my whole heart. What I mean by that is, I have been hesitant to completely surrender unto him. I’ve been really honest about my walk and my struggles. I wanted to put in a half effort and get great results and of course I learned, God isn’t going to allow that. I have recently been reading a lot of spiritual books, doing a little meditation and increasing my prayer life. Things have been tense but I still know that God has a plan for me, I just need to be still and trust him.

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Today just so happens to be my daughter’s 6th birthday and although I had a great time, my mind was running. Thinking about how I am going to make ends meet and it became overwhelming. As I pulled down her decorations I remembered that I was supposed to start my Jesus Calling devotional yesterday. I came into my room, book in hand and decided I was going to start reading it. As I began to read the introduction, I felt an overwhelming feeling to lay down. I ignored my body but kept on reading and I heard God saying to me, “surrender”. I kept reading trying to ignore the voice I had heard and I heard it again, “surrender”. Now, I’ve heard of this type of thing but I always quietly doubted it because it hadn’t happened to me.

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I could not even believe that God was pulling at my heart strings like that. He knew my “secret” of trying to run from him so he came and got me. When I say I ended up sprawled out, across my bed with tears streaming down my face, I mean it. All I could do was say, “Lord, I surrender” over and over again! I began to tell him that I’m handing it over to him, the guilt, the shame, the impatience, the impurities, the questioning and doubting him. I could not get up and as I poured my heart out to him, I slowly felt a warm peace come over me. I just laid there with my face in my covers and my eyes closed for a minute as he soothed my worried mind. Before I knew it, all that heaviness I’ve been carrying around for weeks just melted right off of me. I didn’t worry about how people would judge me because of the way my life has been going for the past couple of years. I found comfort in Jeremiah 29:11. I felt comfort in the fact that he has a plan for me and in due time, he will reveal it. I don’t have to stack myself up against someone else’s success because he has me in a special spot. He knows the plans he has for me and my season isn’t here yet but he is working behind the scenes for me. He definitely loves me and he has great things in store for me. No matter how tough things get, he is not leaving me but shaping and molding me. Let’s Pray!

Father God,

I come to you now thanking you for revealing yourself to me in a special way. I thank you for hearing my fears, seeing my tears and coming to remind me of your love for me. Lord, this journey may not be easy but you have not and will not leave me. Father I know that you have my best interest at heart and I bless your name for hiding me until I am more mature spiritually. I know that you have great plans for me and you have come to get your daughter and reassure me that everything is going to be okay. Thank you Lord for loving me even when I didn’t want it. Forgive me for pushing you away and doubting your capabilities in my situation. I surrender unto your direction, unto your word and cast all my burdens upon you because I know you will take care of them. Thank you for sustaining me and continuing to open spiritual doors for me to walk through and learn. It is in your mighty name I pray,

Amen

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I know at times it can be hard to feel and be connected to God. Sometimes it is a lack of faith, current health situation, feeling abandoned by him or just not putting in that work. Are you ashamed to admit it? Do you feel it makes you less of a Christian? Are you angry at God? Well it is normal to have those feelings when you are operating outside of your connection. I can totally relate as I’m going through the season currently. I’ll share with you what is helping me and my prayer is that it will bless you.

Recently, things have gone up and down in my life. From my health to finances to family woes, it has been really trying. I went from studying my word, blogging regularly, praying consistently and connecting to God to none of that. I am going to be honest because someone needs to hear this! It went from thirsting for God’s word to always complaint and throwing myself pity parties. Little by little I stopped reading my bible plan, skipping morning prayer, blogging sporadically and not doing God’s business. Why? Because I became upset with God and where he had me, I felt abandoned. I became so flesh led that I thought “turning my back on him” was hurting him (wow right?). I never realized how much it was hurting me and ruining our connection.

One day I had this profound thought and it was to return to him with my entire heart and soul. I was expecting so much in MY time that I didn’t even acknowledge his timing is perfect. I had to find a way to get back to him so I decided little by little to plug back in. Making prayer my starting point of the day is back on my list. If you want to reconnect to God you HAVE to talk to him and center yourself in his presence without interruption. Don’t give him a quick second and go about your day giving all of yourself to everything/everyone else.

Get in your word: You have to know his word to connect to him because in his silence, his word ALWAYS speaks. That prayer and Bible together is your direct line and connection to him. That is as close as you can get to him when seeking that reconnect. I still struggle because I have that battle of the flesh vs. what I know I should be doing.

Limit distractions: For me, social media can be VERY distracting! If it causes you to covet, lust, question God or spend less time with God, CUT IT until you are spiritually mature. I left Facebook almost 2 years ago and I just deleted Instagram a week ago because I’m not spiritually mature enough to balance. I’ll admit I found myself coveting, questioning and then getting upset with God for where he has me.

Buy yourself some books and read encouraging blogs: I purchased a few books that will pour into me and grow me spiritually. I also browse blogs that have an encouraging word and bring me back. Writing blogs is also a great way to check myself and pour into someone else facing my struggles. I’m brutally honest in my blogs because I want people to know, YES I struggle with these things. I’m not ashamed to share it because I’m better because of it and you will be too.

Have a heart-to-heart with God: Don’t be ashamed, embarrassed or too filled with pride to speak to God. He wants to hear from you! He is waiting for you and I to find our way back. He welcomes us back with open arms and doesn’t beat us down because of our disconnect. Pour your heart out, get back in his presence, start anew and most of all plug back in, your signal is strong.

Standing with you in prayer,

BareFacesPureHearts

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Well where do you start when you just have the need to freeze time? Have you ever been in a position where you just wish you had that “click” remote? I mean if you could pull out that remote and just stop all production on life you would’ve abused it by now? I am in that season RIGHT now and I want to encourage not only you but myself.

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The first thing I’ve come to realize is that I’ve cast my cares upon The Lord half heartedly. I’m so flustered because I’ve given him my “junk” but I keep going back to check on it. He has made way after way, answered prayer after prayer and here I am totally frazzled. What I had/have to do is remember, GOD HAS ME! So you know my advice to you is, give it over to him understanding and knowing GOD HAS YOU! He doesn’t need our help to step into our situations, he got this. No matter what storm we are facing in the coming week, day, hour, minute, second, health bad, bills overflowing, GOD got this. He is overseeing us so he already knows what the outcome is. We have to have faith in our Heavenly Father, know that even though it doesn’t feel good or look good it’s going to end in OUR good. You know Vashawn Mitchell’s song “Turning Around For Me?” Well I encourage you to believe those lyrics because as he sang, it won’t always be like this. Believe that sooner or later it’ll turn in my favor!

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I know that many things are ahead of me for the upcoming week so I’m choosing to trust God. When the plot thickens in my life, I’m going to speak life over myself. My cares? I’m going to cast them upon him and believe that he has my back. Though we may get discouraged and think he isn’t moving “fast enough” God got this! Even in our rants or total despair it may even feel like he isn’t for us but HE IS! He is waiting on you to let go of that “junk” and let him discard it properly. I encourage you tonight, when things get tough, get so unbearable to your human strength, call out to him. If you are at work, go to the bathroom and remind yourself “God you got this!” Lord it’s NOT over and I declare this path is going to straighten. What ever situation you find yourself in, just throw your head back, stretch your arms out and start to pray. If you can’t do that then just stop what you are doing, bow your head and start declaring his word and love over yourself. Don’t stay in that moment of frustration, cry out, call out, shout it out, just release the feelings of defeat.  Let’s pray!

Father God,

I come to you with a heart full of thanks! Even though life is beating on me I know you got this. I thank you for sustaining me in the midst of storms, attacks, lack and everything that has come to destroy me. Lord I fall down on my knees, at your feet knowing that you are keeping me. I call upon your name for protection, my needs being met and the spirit of defeat and distress being lifted from me. As you guide me on this path I open my mind and heart to all the blessings you have in store for me. I declare right now father that the storm can’t take me under because you have your hands on me. Father I see you working things out, I believe you are before me knocking down all things/ people looking for my downfall. I am the head and not the tail, all things are working together for my good, no weapon formed against me shall prosper. You have ALL power in YOUR hands Lord, you are the one and only God, I praise and thank you right now in advance for what you are doing. I declare and decree your goodness, your faithfulness and your mercy over all the situations I’m facing God. You have won again! I will have victory, the chains are falling off of me right now,I’m no longer hostage to those negative thoughts! It is in your name I pray and say thank you Lord,

amen

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As a single Christian woman you have definitely heard of Boaz. From women saying “waiting for my Boaz” to women saying “don’t rush for your Boaz”. This immediately was intriguing to me but I hadn’t read my bible so I kind of stuck with the “standard” of Boaz. Once I opened my bible I saw that Boaz was a great protector, a good guy but he didn’t have eyes for Ruth. He saw Ruth for her value but he didn’t particularly show an interest in her for a life partner/wife. How many times have WE settled for some one? How many times have we made ourselves available to a man who we hadn’t got confirmation was even interested in us? MANY TIMES! I know this was a leading reason I kept ending up heartbroken, because I wasn’t chosen, I chose.

 

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Walking through the text I came upon Ruth 2:5 where we can confirm Boaz saw Ruth and inquired about who she was. Ruth 2:5 says ,Then Boaz spoke to his servant who was in charge of the workers He asked, “Whose girl is that?” 6. The servant answered, “She is the Moabite woman who came with Naomi from the country of Moab. 7. She came early this morning and asked me if she could follow the workers and gather the grain that was left on the ground. She rested only a short time in that shelter”. You can read on later but this particular passage showed that Boaz was a good guy, he looked out for Ruth. He admired the woman she was, up early trying to find a way to help her mother in law Naomi.

 

 

Once you get into Ruth chapter 3 you can see where Naomi tells Ruth how to get close to Boaz. Keep in mind Boaz is willing to help Ruth, thinks highly of her but he still hasn’t shown a romantic interest in her. Her mother in law, Naomi told her to sit at the feet of Boaz and ask him about marriage. Boaz gives Ruth his word that if the next relative in line will not take her, he will. Now that part right there is where we get to see how the standard of Boaz just doesn’t stand. We know that if you are a great woman, a guy ready for a wife will not pass up on you. He’s not going to risk losing you to someone else because he KNOWS you are worth having. Needless to say, the relative declined because he wanted to keep his own land and didn’t want to risk it. Now that right here speaks volumes because the relative wouldn’t give up his land but Boaz would pass up on such a woman as Ruth? Hmmmmm… The plot thickens.

 

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Boaz does go on to marry Ruth in Ruth Chapter 4 and they even have a son who Ruth gives to Naomi. She knew that Naomi had been given some pain in the loss of husband and sons, so she shared her son with Naomi. Now the thing I have a problem with is, as single Christian women, we are placing ourselves at the feet of men. You know how you have been single for a certain amount of time and you start to go ahead of God? You get sick of having no companionship so you become the flirtatious woman, start approaching men all for the sake of having one? It won’t work because that is not who God has for you. Sure, you can have someone introduce you to a man but if he doesn’t pursue you then he isn’t for you.

In Ruth, I can say she ended up having the happy ending but for single Christian women, you are worth being found. No man should see your value, see what a wonderful servant of God you are but take you on because no one else will. That is an uncomfortable feeling for me, just being  man’s pick because there is no one else to have me and he knows I desire marriage so he takes me on? No, I just can’t agree with that, wrap my heart/head around that notion. Boaz was a great demonstration of how a man will cover you, provide for you but in a relationship aspect, I’m not so sure.

 

As single Christian women,God has a standard for us and if we are obedient, he will bring us a mate. No matter how lonely our nights get, how many years we have to be single, WAIT on God. It might be a struggle but it is so worth it in the end. I’ve been single for 3 years now, I long for marriage, I’m working on my obedience to God but going before his plan just isn’t an option for me. I know that God has someone for me and in his timing, I will be found and be the only pick for him. It might be times I get sad, lonely, frustrated, but I’d rather all those emotions than being a leftover. When you are going through those hard single phases, pray to God and cast your cares upon him. Pour your heart out to God, vent that emotion to him, he is listening.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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I’m feeling very compelled to write this blog because I believe someone else needs this word. Fear of stepping out can be very crippling, it is very scary and also leaves us stagnant. If you are like myself, you can talk yourself out of ANYTHING! I mean meet your next steps with excuses and literally not move from your comfort zone because you are frozen with fear. In this blog I want to help someone get free from the spirit of stagnancy, fear and encourage you to move forward. Something I haven’t disclosed to anyone is, God placed a vision on my heart BUT I haven’t been obedient and it’s eating me up. I began talking myself out of it, making excuses but I know God’s plan for me is good. He knows I’m in a state of fear but I hear him calling me to move. I had to literally silence the voice of fear in my head and say, “Hush, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me – Philippians 4:13 .” In God’s word he has already assured us that we are equipped through him. You don’t need validation from man, he will provide the money to bring it to pass all because you are being obedient to him.

 

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I encourage you to examine why you are fearful. If it is because of rejection just know God wouldn’t have placed it on your heart if he didn’t have people to receive it. He wants this “thing” to be brought to the people because it will help someone. You will bring someone in to him, falling on their face and connecting with our awesome God. If it is because you feel you’re too messed up or have done too much wrong, you’ve been forgiven. I always say there is healing in the process, there is growth in our pain! I struggled for a long time with the opinion of people because they know my past. The simple truth is when you repented GOD wiped your slate clean and doesn’t hold who you once were against you. The opinion of people means absolutely NOTHING when God already stamped his approval on it. When God is handing out blessings he doesn’t ask anyone for their opinion or what you did. He judges you off of the pureness in your heart so shake that off.

 

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The next thing you should do is trust God enough to move when he tells you to. You may be praying and saying you have faith but not showing it. What if God has your blessing at the next step of where you are supposed to be stepping? You could literally be holding yourself back just by not being obedient. If you are not sure how to move your feet, PRAY and ask for the wisdom. I’ve been reading The book of Proverbs lately because I want more wisdom. In Proverbs you are constantly reminded of what a blessing it is to be wise. God will direct you and guide you through the vision he places on your heart. He will NEVER place it in your heart to leave you out wondering if he is there with you as you follow his vision for you.

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Bare Faces Pure Hearts is something God placed in my heart in November 2013. I fought it, I didn’t believe it was from him and I was even scared to share it with people. Again, I felt like people really advanced in the bible would question me. I also felt people would have trouble receiving it from a woman so young. I had so many thoughts, so many excuses BUT I finally followed God’s direction and created a platform for it. This ministry focuses on Single Christian Women who are celibate, interested in becoming celibate and need encouragement through the word of God. I’m pouring back into women that all the standards of beauty in the world are not relevant because God has told us in his word what true beauty is. I’ve been through a storm but God delivered me and is now using me as a vessel to bring his love for us back into focus. ( Follow @barefacespurehearts on Instagram) Let’s pray!

 

Father,

Here I am, your vessel needing a touch from you. You’ve given me a vision and I ask that you release the spirit of fear from my life. I want to spread your word, follow your direction and I know your plans for me are GREAT. As I travel this journey called life, I ask that you keep your hand on me and elevate me because I am now ready. Lord thank you for choosing me in spite of my past and the opinions of others. I’m so happy you see the best in me even when I don’t feel at my best Lord. In your awesome and mighty name I pray,

Amen

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So I know first hand how hard it is to wait on God to reveal his plans for our lives. You get impatient, you get discouraged, you get stressed and possibly depressed but trust his timing. This last week hasn’t been easy for me, I’ve had my health come under attack and it has left me a little sad. While going through the motions and the days of sadness I just ran across this verse. Jeremiah 29:11 which reads; for I know the thoughts that I think toward you, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you an unexpected end. Doesn’t it seem as though God is punishing you at times? The hell rages on, the bad news just keeps coming and you don’t know where to turn besides right back to the same God, you may be doubting. Well hopefully after this blog you can be encouraged that God is standing right there and has good plans for your life.

 

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For about a year I’ve been seeking employment, praying for things my heart desires but never stopped doing my own self work. I realized I had some things I needed to work on before I could even think of asking God for more. I’ve been doing that work and still praying daily and at times I’ve gotten discouraged but I understand God has a plan. Now if it was my plans, I’d be married, working, living on my own and enjoying an abundant life with no worries. With God, that just isn’t his plan, even in my discouragement I could look back and say God isn’t going to leave me hanging. All my needs were met but he still is doing a work in me and requiring more of me before he can elevate me. At times it has felt like I’ve been left right in the middle of Hell, he turned his back on me but the truth is, he didn’t. God has a way of humbling us and bringing us right back to him.  I have a couple tips for you in your times of trouble and will hopefully giving you a new perspective. 

Tip 1: Increase your faith, decrease your thoughts: When you are thinking too much and fussing at God you are giving the devil glory. Set your faith in motion and start claiming your freedom from the situation right now! God hears every prayer and just because he hasn’t answered them right now doesn’t mean he isn’t going to answer them later. 

Tip 2:  Do a motive check: Whatever you are asking God for, make sure it’s not for selfish reasons. When you get that house, will you run any and everybody through it? When you get that job will you be a faithful tithe giver? When your health gets better will you turn back around and feed it poison? These are all things you need to think about when going to God for things. 

Like I mentioned before God has a plan for our lives, we don’t need to help him. He has everything set for his timing and we just have to trust him and increase our faith. I know first hand that it isn’t always the easiest thing to do and we think God needs help but HE DOESN’T. Just reflect on any time where you were in a situation and couldn’t see your way out. Didn’t God step in, clean up your mess and still love you like you’d never done anything? Yes, he has done it for me and I just thank him for his perfect timing. I know my health is going to improve, I know my plans take a back seat to his and I will continue to trust him. Will you?

Let’s pray,

Father God,

I come to you with a humble heart and a mind set on you. Thank you Lord for your plans and your perfect timing. I ask that you hear my heart and comfort me in times of distress. I know you will not leave me hanging and out to dry. You are such a gracious God and you have great thoughts toward me. I’ve never seen the righteous forsaken and never will because I am your child. In your name I pray,

amen

 

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Declarations for your financial situation: 

I declare and decree God is working on my financial situation.  God has heard my prayers, seen my tears and is working everything out. I refuse to succumb to stress about a situation that is already handled. I trust in The Lord and have never seen the righteous forsaken. At this very moment, at this very hour, at this very second I dry the tears from my eyes, release a shout of victory unto you oh Lord! In the power of your mighty name, I count it done, Amen.

Declarations for your love life:

I declare and decree that God has perfect timing in bringing forth my husband/wife. God knows my desire to be married and will honor this in HIS timing. I know that this season of singleness is a preparation season. I ask you Lord to come into my heart and prepare me to be a wife/husband. I declare greatness over my future marriage and have already submitted myself and future spouse to you. In Jesus name, it is done, AMEN

Declarations for protection from your enemies:

I declare and decree that God has removed me from danger. I believe God for the removal of enemies posed as friends. I believe God is cleaning out people who mean me no good, he is taking care of it! In Jesus name, I believe it, AMEN 

 

 

I can count on both hands and feet how many times people have told me to fight for what I believe in. We believe just because we believe in it, it is going to work in our favor, right? WRONG, I’m here to tell you if you don’t consult God, it is not going to work in your favor. I’ve been placed in difficult positions lately, from friendships to teachers and family and it just gets tough. You think if your fight is for a good cause nobody will be able to deny you and they WILL. 

Recently I decided to reach out to a state program that my daughter attends because it just hasn’t been flowing right. I’d tried speaking to the teacher and she just wasn’t receptive. When I enrolled her I was told it was Pre-K but they had so many different elements in the classroom I didn’t believe she would learn anything. I’m talking about children ages 3-5, some don’t speak English, they were playing all day and I was just fed up. After getting no where with the teacher I finally had to call in the big dogs also known as the director and state officials. It went from the blame game to the straight up “how much money do you have to put toward this program?” I was shocked because I thought inquiring about a proper education for my soon to be kindergartner would be smiled upon. Sadly it was not and I felt totally defeated, I got off the phone feeling like a dart had been shot into my chest.

I simply had to just pull out woman’s biggest weapon known to man, prayer. I laid on my bed and just poured my heart out to God, letting him know how I felt and asking for his direction. I wanted to get things done on MY timing not giving God the upper hand and letting him work things out. I just felt an urgency to “make them do their job” but God was sitting me down to watch him work. Isn’t it sometimes frustrating when we cant get things our way? Don’t you just despise having to stay in your seat when you feel you were called to action? Well don’t because God has a plan for your hardships and frustration.

After my attempts, I’m still unsure of what the outcome is but I trust and believe he is working things out on my behalf. I truly believe he will not let things continue the way they have been going. Although I want to keep fighting for it, I refuse to get in his way trying to fix things myself. He has promised me in his word that what is meant for my bad, he’ll turn for my good so I’ll rest in that. I also know for without faith it is impossible to please him. I won’t give bible scriptures because I want you to go look it up for yourself. Just know that your crying is only momentarily, it has it’s expiration date and he is going to take care of it, WHEN you leave it to him.