Archives for posts with tag: Single Ladies

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As a single Christian woman you have definitely heard of Boaz. From women saying “waiting for my Boaz” to women saying “don’t rush for your Boaz”. This immediately was intriguing to me but I hadn’t read my bible so I kind of stuck with the “standard” of Boaz. Once I opened my bible I saw that Boaz was a great protector, a good guy but he didn’t have eyes for Ruth. He saw Ruth for her value but he didn’t particularly show an interest in her for a life partner/wife. How many times have WE settled for some one? How many times have we made ourselves available to a man who we hadn’t got confirmation was even interested in us? MANY TIMES! I know this was a leading reason I kept ending up heartbroken, because I wasn’t chosen, I chose.

 

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Walking through the text I came upon Ruth 2:5 where we can confirm Boaz saw Ruth and inquired about who she was. Ruth 2:5 says ,Then Boaz spoke to his servant who was in charge of the workers He asked, “Whose girl is that?” 6. The servant answered, “She is the Moabite woman who came with Naomi from the country of Moab. 7. She came early this morning and asked me if she could follow the workers and gather the grain that was left on the ground. She rested only a short time in that shelter”. You can read on later but this particular passage showed that Boaz was a good guy, he looked out for Ruth. He admired the woman she was, up early trying to find a way to help her mother in law Naomi.

 

 

Once you get into Ruth chapter 3 you can see where Naomi tells Ruth how to get close to Boaz. Keep in mind Boaz is willing to help Ruth, thinks highly of her but he still hasn’t shown a romantic interest in her. Her mother in law, Naomi told her to sit at the feet of Boaz and ask him about marriage. Boaz gives Ruth his word that if the next relative in line will not take her, he will. Now that part right there is where we get to see how the standard of Boaz just doesn’t stand. We know that if you are a great woman, a guy ready for a wife will not pass up on you. He’s not going to risk losing you to someone else because he KNOWS you are worth having. Needless to say, the relative declined because he wanted to keep his own land and didn’t want to risk it. Now that right here speaks volumes because the relative wouldn’t give up his land but Boaz would pass up on such a woman as Ruth? Hmmmmm… The plot thickens.

 

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Boaz does go on to marry Ruth in Ruth Chapter 4 and they even have a son who Ruth gives to Naomi. She knew that Naomi had been given some pain in the loss of husband and sons, so she shared her son with Naomi. Now the thing I have a problem with is, as single Christian women, we are placing ourselves at the feet of men. You know how you have been single for a certain amount of time and you start to go ahead of God? You get sick of having no companionship so you become the flirtatious woman, start approaching men all for the sake of having one? It won’t work because that is not who God has for you. Sure, you can have someone introduce you to a man but if he doesn’t pursue you then he isn’t for you.

In Ruth, I can say she ended up having the happy ending but for single Christian women, you are worth being found. No man should see your value, see what a wonderful servant of God you are but take you on because no one else will. That is an uncomfortable feeling for me, just being  man’s pick because there is no one else to have me and he knows I desire marriage so he takes me on? No, I just can’t agree with that, wrap my heart/head around that notion. Boaz was a great demonstration of how a man will cover you, provide for you but in a relationship aspect, I’m not so sure.

 

As single Christian women,God has a standard for us and if we are obedient, he will bring us a mate. No matter how lonely our nights get, how many years we have to be single, WAIT on God. It might be a struggle but it is so worth it in the end. I’ve been single for 3 years now, I long for marriage, I’m working on my obedience to God but going before his plan just isn’t an option for me. I know that God has someone for me and in his timing, I will be found and be the only pick for him. It might be times I get sad, lonely, frustrated, but I’d rather all those emotions than being a leftover. When you are going through those hard single phases, pray to God and cast your cares upon him. Pour your heart out to God, vent that emotion to him, he is listening.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Another wonderful young lady who I connected with via Instagram who was open and willing to share her journey. I emailed her and she had no hesitation about spreading her journey to further God’s kingdom and help our single sisters out. Sis I thank you for being so open and willing to feature on my blog and represent the kingdom. I absolutely adore you and love your ministry and we are going to make this Celibacy thing BIG with the help of God.

 

Celibacy Feature

       1.   Tell me about yourself:

My name is Jasmine Harris, and I am single, saved, satisfied, seeking the Lord and saving my goodies for marriage J I am the CEO and Founder of Confessions of a Single Christian and I’m So Worth It ministries. God birthed Confessions of a Single Christian 12.22.12, and I’m So Worth It 03.13.13—each of these ministries were conceived from my pain and God has used it for his purpose and glory. Confessions of a Single Christian and I’m So Worth It vision is for women to find joy in their season of singleness, become complete in Christ, pursue their purpose, and discover their identity and worth in Jesus Christ. There was a cry of Tamar from women in the body of Christ, and women in general. There was a cry from women that have been used, abused and thrown out like yesterday’s garbage and left to pick up the pieces, and make sense of their life and worth. This cry has been heard by God, and he has commissioned and appointed me to help restore the woman that has been broken, to help mend the woman that has been used, and to bring healing to the woman that has been beaten. So many women have defined their worth by the men in their lives, or lack thereof whether it be a romantic relationship or father, and my ministries were birthed to awaken their worth and purpose in Christ Jesus! (Sorry this was so long, but I am extremely passionate about women being whole in Christ and I desire to help them in this process to purpose

2.   What brought you to the celibate lifestyle?

Pain, heartbreak and disappointment brought me to the celibacy lifestyle; however, it is Jesus’s grace that has kept and his love, which has maintained me! I was tired of giving my all in meaningless and purposeless relationships. I was giving my all to everyone except Jesus. I would only go to God when I needed his hands, and I was never seeking his heart. In the summer of 2008, my life was completely turned upside down, and when I was in a very dark place Jesus’s light came and found me. At the point of hitting rock bottom I found The Rock, Jesus Christ and re-dedicated my life to Christ, and began a path of purity and pursuing my purpose in Christ!

3. How has being celibate changed your life?

Oh my goodness—I have sooooooooo much peace and clarity. Being celibate has completely changed my life for the better. It has pushed me so much closer to Christ and I see things so much clearer than before. Sex before marriage clouds your mind and judgment, and celibacy clears those clouds. I can only speak for myself, but when I was in the world having sex I tolerated so much because the sex had me confused and in bondage. Celibacy broke those chains and set me free—free in Christ, free in my body, free in my mind and free in my spirit.

 

4. Do you believe celibacy is something that all women should practice?

I absolutely 110% think all women AND men should pursue purity until marriage. Sex before marriage cheapens the courting/dating process. Your marriage night is supposed to be a gift to one another and glorify God, because you honored him with your life and body during the courtship. As a couple saving sex for marriage allows you to really get to know each other and work things out instead of covering up your pain and problems with the temporary solution of sex. When you are  practicing celibacy during courtships forces you to get in front of God with your problems instead of the bed to cover them up

5. What advice would you give to women struggling with deciding to become celibate?

My advice is the struggle is real, but nothing you can’t overcome in Christ. When God says, “My Grace Is Sufficient” you have to believe that, lean on it and depend on it. I would encourage you to remove anyone and anything from your life that would cause you to stumble in your walk. There was a season I could not listen to any love songs or watch any romantic movies or novels. My mind would go on one heck of a trip, and take me back to sexual thoughts and memories. I seriously had to renew my mind daily and depend on God’s grace to get me through, and take it one day at a time.  Through time, daily denying your flesh and feeding your spirit with the Word of God you can and will go from struggling to surviving. You can do it!! You can achieve celibacy!! You can pursue purity, but not in your own strength.

 

6.What do you say to the women in a relationship who’s been sexually active with her boyfriend and believes she can’t stop having sex with him now because she’s already started?

I would say you never know unless you STOP!! And, if your boyfriend does not respect your decision to honor Christ with your body, then he is not the man God has for you point, blank, period!! Get out of the relationship, stop settling and chase Christ with your whole heart, and rest in God until he sends you the right man and awakens love in your life. You Can Do It Girl!!!!

7. What words of wisdom do you want to share with our sisters in Christ regarding Celibacy?

I want to tell my single sisters that you are so beautiful, so worth it, so worth waiting for, and so worth pursuing. You are such a precious jewel in the eye’s of

 What w God and he never intended for anyone to use you or abuse you, but whatever someone has done to you it does not take away how much God loves you or your worth in Christ. No matter what you’ve done or allowed to be done to you—you can always come back to God for forgiveness and restore your relationship with Christ. You do not have to settle or lower your standards for love, because the man God has for you will respect your body, heart and be in agreement with your decision to pursue purity. Do not be afraid to walk away from anyone that does not respect you or your beliefs. You are loved! You are sooooooooooooo Worth It!!

 

 

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Ministry: Confessions Of A Single Christian & I’m  So Worth It